Ableist
I first encountered the word ableism a few months ago when a relative posted about it on Facebook. I didn't give it much thought at the time. Joining TS communities on Facebook and Twitter has forced me to take a hard look at what the term means to me, how I have engaged in ableist behavior over the course of my life, and how I can change my outlook and my actions. I want to put it out there that I haven't couched myself in the vocabulary of disability/ableism and my opinions regarding these issues are not at all refined and may be inappropriate. I am sorry for that. I'm trying to learn and to change my behaviors, so please point out areas where I have room to grow. I have a feeling I may not feel too great about myself by the end of this one.
The Google-able definition of ableism is "discrimination in favor of able-bodied people". I'm ashamed to say that as of a few months ago, that is not an idea I had ever considered. I'm fully aware that people of color, members of the LGBTQA community, non-Christians, women, and other groups in America face discrimination every day. It never occurred to me to include disabled people in that list, and it frustrates me. I don't consider myself to have many blind spots with regards to social issues. I've been pulling at that thread in my brain for a few days now and I'm not really close to understanding how I let this happen. Hopefully hashing this out digitally will help.
I think ableism is a range of negative reactions to another person's disability or the unwillingness to acknowledge it at all. I think it is making wheelchair accessibility a second thought when designing a new building. I think it is expecting that a disabled person will ask for accommodation if she needs it instead of making sure the world she lives in expects and accepts disabled people to be in it and plans accordingly. I think it's when you make "short bus" jokes anywhere, but especially near your kids. I think it's even the slightest insinuation that the body a person lives in has any bearing on the quality of the person who lives in it. Ableism is when I get frustrated in the store when I'm in line behind a person with a disability who needs a few extra seconds to get organized. It is when I'm in a movie theater and I get angry when I realize I'm in a showing with closed captioning. It is when someone on social media has the nerve to advocate for people with disabilities and I roll my eyes, as if for some reason it's selfish or whiny to advocate for oneself or a loved one. It is when I hold the door for a person in a wheelchair and I briefly feel like I'm the Holiest Person Who Has Ever Lived instead of just A Guy Who Held the Door For Another Guy. I said above that I may not feel too great about myself by the end of this, but it only occurred to me now that you, reader, might feel even worse about me. Please bear with me. I'm trying to honestly lay out my prejudices so I can put them in the light, understand them, and correct them.
I believe that my ableism has been mostly internal. That is to say that to my recollection, I've never been actively unkind to a person with a disability. Don't get me wrong; I still understand that this is an untenable mindset. I was a pretty insecure kid and I was routinely bullied, so I wouldn't put it past me to have taken a few verbal shots at a disabled classmate just to make sure I felt like there was someone else below me socially, even if that social stratification only existed in my head. Most of my ableism has manifested in passivity. I have never once advocated for disabled people. I have written my Senators and Representatives a couple times for different things, I vote, and I've gone to a rally or two in my day. It never once occurred to me to support the rights of the disabled. I can think of two possible reasons why. First, I think I assumed that the Americans With Disabilities Act (ADA) had successfully cured all American society of bias against disabled people. It was easy to assume that someone else had done the work for me and that all was good. Obviously that is incorrect. It is also easy for me to assume that Affirmative Action fixed racism and that Violence Against Women Act ended violence against women. These are things I, know to be untrue. The second reason (and I'm only guessing here, so please correct me if I'm wrong) is that I think people with disabilities are routinely told to put a smile on their face, take the world head on, and push through with a great attitude and a couple of smarmy truisms. That is not a call to self-advocacy and to me, silence is the same as acceptance. I'm going to try and change that attitude, but I know it's been true to this point. If someone doesn't tell me there's a problem, I assume there is no problem.
So how can I change my outlook? Well for starters, I'm going to keep myself on social media to learn from the great community I've started to connect with on Twitter. Second, I'm going to change how I think about equality. To this point, I've been taught and chosen to believe that it means to ignore people's differences. I'm going to lean more into the idea that everyone is equal regardless of their differences. I'm going to look into how I can advocate for disabled people in small and big ways. Finally, I'm going to listen to anyone who wants to talk to me on this subject, anywhere and anytime. I'm a terrible conversationalist, so at least this last one should be pretty easy.
The Google-able definition of ableism is "discrimination in favor of able-bodied people". I'm ashamed to say that as of a few months ago, that is not an idea I had ever considered. I'm fully aware that people of color, members of the LGBTQA community, non-Christians, women, and other groups in America face discrimination every day. It never occurred to me to include disabled people in that list, and it frustrates me. I don't consider myself to have many blind spots with regards to social issues. I've been pulling at that thread in my brain for a few days now and I'm not really close to understanding how I let this happen. Hopefully hashing this out digitally will help.
I think ableism is a range of negative reactions to another person's disability or the unwillingness to acknowledge it at all. I think it is making wheelchair accessibility a second thought when designing a new building. I think it is expecting that a disabled person will ask for accommodation if she needs it instead of making sure the world she lives in expects and accepts disabled people to be in it and plans accordingly. I think it's when you make "short bus" jokes anywhere, but especially near your kids. I think it's even the slightest insinuation that the body a person lives in has any bearing on the quality of the person who lives in it. Ableism is when I get frustrated in the store when I'm in line behind a person with a disability who needs a few extra seconds to get organized. It is when I'm in a movie theater and I get angry when I realize I'm in a showing with closed captioning. It is when someone on social media has the nerve to advocate for people with disabilities and I roll my eyes, as if for some reason it's selfish or whiny to advocate for oneself or a loved one. It is when I hold the door for a person in a wheelchair and I briefly feel like I'm the Holiest Person Who Has Ever Lived instead of just A Guy Who Held the Door For Another Guy. I said above that I may not feel too great about myself by the end of this, but it only occurred to me now that you, reader, might feel even worse about me. Please bear with me. I'm trying to honestly lay out my prejudices so I can put them in the light, understand them, and correct them.
I believe that my ableism has been mostly internal. That is to say that to my recollection, I've never been actively unkind to a person with a disability. Don't get me wrong; I still understand that this is an untenable mindset. I was a pretty insecure kid and I was routinely bullied, so I wouldn't put it past me to have taken a few verbal shots at a disabled classmate just to make sure I felt like there was someone else below me socially, even if that social stratification only existed in my head. Most of my ableism has manifested in passivity. I have never once advocated for disabled people. I have written my Senators and Representatives a couple times for different things, I vote, and I've gone to a rally or two in my day. It never once occurred to me to support the rights of the disabled. I can think of two possible reasons why. First, I think I assumed that the Americans With Disabilities Act (ADA) had successfully cured all American society of bias against disabled people. It was easy to assume that someone else had done the work for me and that all was good. Obviously that is incorrect. It is also easy for me to assume that Affirmative Action fixed racism and that Violence Against Women Act ended violence against women. These are things I, know to be untrue. The second reason (and I'm only guessing here, so please correct me if I'm wrong) is that I think people with disabilities are routinely told to put a smile on their face, take the world head on, and push through with a great attitude and a couple of smarmy truisms. That is not a call to self-advocacy and to me, silence is the same as acceptance. I'm going to try and change that attitude, but I know it's been true to this point. If someone doesn't tell me there's a problem, I assume there is no problem.
So how can I change my outlook? Well for starters, I'm going to keep myself on social media to learn from the great community I've started to connect with on Twitter. Second, I'm going to change how I think about equality. To this point, I've been taught and chosen to believe that it means to ignore people's differences. I'm going to lean more into the idea that everyone is equal regardless of their differences. I'm going to look into how I can advocate for disabled people in small and big ways. Finally, I'm going to listen to anyone who wants to talk to me on this subject, anywhere and anytime. I'm a terrible conversationalist, so at least this last one should be pretty easy.
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